I’m knackered. I haven’t posted for a while as I haven’t stopped working – honestly.
I get home from the office. Open up my number 2 job emails, call people wanting to book up for consultations and schedule them in, have consultations, swot up ready for consultations and then follow consultations up with an email and process the payment details.
I have only done 7 consultations so far (3 of them back to back this afternoon and evening) so I think a lot of the time has been spent setting up my systems and getting into the groove. Let me tell you now talking for an hour is harder than you might think. I must not complain, I’m getting paid well for this work and I am helping people get through a very difficult and upsetting time. But……. (here comes the moan)
TV – remember TV. I know when I was on maternity leave I missed the odd program, but the beauty of on demand is that you can watch most BBC and channel 4 programs for a week after they air. i should be so lucky! Tuesday night I half watched Holby City while swotting up ready for some more consultations (I’ve been out of the business for nearly a year and the law has changed since I left!) and thats it! Goodbye Ashes to Ashes, Torchwood, ER, Eastenders, Mitchell and Webb and all the other little things that have kept me sane. No Mum, I havent watched Desperate Housewifes and I doubt I will ever get the time again.
Rather than focussing on my own self inflicted overload (huby didnt force me to take on extra work, I emailed a company specialising in my area and offered my services – I’m a hussy I know!), I’m going to now focus on Baby B’s first week at big boy nursery (probably a culture shock for him not to have the BBC1 morning drivel programmes on all day long as well!)
On Tuesday even his Daddy was horrified to see how he reacted when we took him into the nursery. We got to work and I braced myself for the inevitable phone call to say he couldn’t be calmed and would someone please get him. Baby B’s Daddy was ready to shoot home for the morning and my Mum had split her normal working day into two mornings so that she could look after him all afternoon. Nothing happened. I had the same awful compulsion that you do when you have a plaster on over a cut (I just have to look and have a quick pick at the scab!) and at 10ish I called the nursery (he had been there since 8). They said he was crying on and off but at least he would stop for a bit. We agreed that if he was still too upset to eat at lunchtime my Mum would be called to get him rather than letting him starve.
I did a bit of work, met the new admin girl stared at a computer screen (its different when you have to work rather than muck around on facebook and babycentre!) and then at 1 I got a call from my Mum. I gritted my teeth and thought Baby B had done so well to do half a day.
According to Mum (who had called the nursery before leaving her office) Baby B had a nap after they spoke to me, woke up fairly happy, had lunch and was now playing happily. Obviously greedy Baby B was relieved after a morning of crying to see a decent lunch and was thrilled to get pudding (bananas in custard!). We picked him up around 5 as the nice nursery nurses tried to wipe his face after his tea and pudding (semolina – it went everywhere!) and looking at the note book the nursery keeps he is happy enough at nursery to nap for over an hour and to eat decent amounts.
He did the same on Wednesday, cried when we left him, picked up after a while and was delighted to get his lunch and pudding. On Thursday I took him to my Mum’s while Iworked from home, when I collected him she’d had a harder time, he would only nap for half an hour, had turned his nose up at my casserole (I can’t compete with the nursery chef) and got very upset if she left the room. I think he is a little confused by everything thats going on, two days at nursery and then being looked after by me, his Daddy and his Nanny.
To make matters more complicated for the poor mite, not only am I not around in the day time but the consultancy work is meaning I spend time locked away in the office on calls and he has to be fed or put to bed by his Daddy. I know that in the long term this is good, it will loosen his clinging to me and get him used to benig cared for by different people but I feel so sad when I hardly see him. Today in between consultations I was running into the lounge to have a cuddle and kiss and feel awful at missing bedtime (again).
He has ate very badly for me so far this week (I have a feeling that getting pudding at two meals a day at nursery may be a factor). He will pick at his savoury and then look expectantly for pudding. I have recently tried offering the odd puds. Jelly (spooned in) was a sucess but was nothing compared to todays lunch of arrabatia tortellini, cheese slice (I think he enjoyed sculpting with this more than eating it) followed by a pot of custard – he loved it – well he had some pasta and cheese but couldnt get enough of the custard!
So to sum up, in a week I have gone from spending possibly too much time with Baby B and being a clingy mummy to being a rather absent and distant parent and have definately fed him too many naughty foods. I’m hoping that we settle back into a nice eating routine where we eat veggies and meat without wondering where the pudding is!